I fished out my mobile and scrolled through the contacts until I found the one person who would be able to sort my head out… My nearest and dearest cousin, Madison.
“Well, hello gorgeous.” Came his almost immediate response to his phone ringing.
“I need you. I need coffee and I need chocolate.” I blurted out desperately.
“Mm-hmm.” I could see him in my mind’s eye nodding and stroking his chin thoughtfully, “Do you also need a big fluffy pillow, a foot massage and a box set of Ugly Betty?”
“Yes.” I wailed down the phone.
He chuckled, “Come on over, I’ll put the kettle on.”
I knocked on his door and he immediately answered, gathering me in and fussing over me, “Oh, babe.” He said, “You look so stressed out – what’s the matter?”
I allowed him to usher me through to the kitchen and I pulled out one of the chairs at the large kitchen table which dominated the room, “Oh, God.” I put my head in my hands and groaned.
Madison came hurrying back across the room, armed with two hot chocolates – with extra marshmallows on mine to give me a boost – and sat down opposite me, “You’re freaking me out now, babe,” he said, “What is it?”
I shook my head and looked up at him, “I may have a crush – on someone I have no business having a crush on.”
His eyes almost popped out of his head, “A girl?” he asked incredulously.
I nearly spat my chocolate across the table, “No!” I spluttered, “Don’t be ridiculous!”
He grinned, “Well, who then?”
“Lachlan O’Shea.” I breathed, “He’s gorgeous.”
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I blamed my mother.
What sort of a name is Angel for a guy anyway?
She’d set my future in stone with that decision.
And no. I wasn’t gay... I just liked guys, that’s all. I liked the way they looked. I liked their bodies... It didn’t make me gay.
“You coming, Angel?”
I looked up. Harry, Justin and Brad were stood looking at me with perfectly matching frowns on their faces. I shook myself and nodded. Shit. I really had to stop zoning out every time we came to watch the ice hockey. “Sure, sure.” I said as I gathered my belonging and followed them out to the foyer.
Harry grinned at me, “Lusting after the captain again, huh?” he asked quietly.
I snorted rudely, “Get lost,” I hissed at him, “I told you I found him attractive in confidence.”
He nodded, “I know you did – I haven’t told either of them – chill out.”
I sighed, “I’m not gay.” I said. I was beginning to sound like a broken record...
“Sure, sure.” He nodded, “I never said you were, mate – but you might want to consider being bi-sexual if it’s less abhorrent to you, but you know ,we are in 2016. It’s no great surprise to people anymore when guys come out – sooner or later no one will have to come out. It’ll just be normal – because it is normal, Angel. Anyone who says otherwise is just ignorant.”
I nodded. I did know that – and I was sure I wasn’t homophobic... “Yeah, maybe.” I acknowledged. “But I really do love Kayleigh...”
I did really love Kayleigh. We’d been best friends since we met in school when we were twelve. We’d decided to give being a couple a go at the end of school when we went to prom together and ended up kissing. It was great kissing her and feeling her up. She was all soft and lovely...
“Have you guys, you know... done it, yet?”
What sort of a question was that? I raised an eyebrow, “And that’s your business because?” I asked.
Harry blushed, “God, sorry – yeah – you’re right, it’s none of my business...”
“No.” I said quietly, “We want to wait until if feels right.”
Harry nodded, his face grave, “Let me give you a tip.” He said, “If you were really into her like that – it would feel right. Your problem is that you’ve chosen the wrong team, mate – you’re into guys whether you like it or not.”
Shit. Why did Harry always have to voice my worst fears...?
Angel... Looking for Trouble... Coming soon