Tuesday, 12 July 2016

Three days to go...

I blamed my parents.
What sort of a name was Angel for a guy anyway?
They’d set my future in stone with that decision.
And no. I wasn’t gay... I just liked guys, that’s all. I liked the way they looked. I liked their bodies... It didn’t make me gay.
“You coming, Angel?”
I looked up. Harry, Justin and Brad were stood looking at me with perfectly matching frowns on their faces. I shook myself and nodded. Shit. I really had to stop zoning out every time we came to watch the ice hockey. “Sure, sure.” I said as I gathered my belonging and followed them out to the foyer.
Harry grinned at me, “Lusting after the captain again, huh?” he asked quietly.
I snorted rudely, “Sod off,” I hissed at him, “I told you I found him attractive in confidence.”
He nodded, “I know you did – I haven’t told either of those two – chill out.”
I sighed, “I’m not gay.” I said. I was beginning to sound like a broken record...
“Sure, sure.” He nodded, “I never said you were, mate – but you might want to consider the possibility that you’re bi-sexual if it’s less abhorrent to you, but you know, we are in 2016. It’s no great surprise to people anymore when guys come out – sooner or later no one will have to come out. It’ll just be normal – because it is normal, Angel. Anyone who says otherwise is just ignorant.”
I nodded. I did know that – and I was sure I wasn’t homophobic... not really.... “Yeah, maybe.” I acknowledged. “But I really do love Kayleigh...”
Kayleigh was my girlfriend and I did, I really loved her. We’d been best friends since we met in school when we were twelve. We’d decided to give being a couple a go at the end of school when we went to prom together and ended up kissing. It was great kissing her and feeling her up. She was all soft and lovely and it felt safe and nice... Yeah. I know, don’t roll your eyes at me, I do realise that’s not really enough...
Harry scratched his neck and looked at me with a slight frown. “Have you guys, you know... done it, yet?”
What sort of a question was that? I raised an eyebrow, “And that’s your business because?” I asked.
Harry blushed, “God, sorry – yeah – you’re right, it really is none of my business...”
I sighed. I knew he was only concerned about me. He was a great friend really. “No.” I said quietly, “We haven’t. We uh, we want to wait until it feels right.”
Harry nodded, his face grave, “Let me give you a tip.” He said, “If you were really into her like that – it would already feel right. Your problem is that you’ve chosen the wrong team, mate – you’re into guys – whether you like it or not.”
Oh, shit. Why did Harry always have to voice my worst fears...?

Angel... Looking for Trouble... Available now for pre-ordering; release date 15th July 2016